Shark Week – Thousands of Shark Sightings Across the Country

One of Ten Types of Men You Shouldn't Date and Must Throwback

One of Ten Types of Men You Shouldn’t Date and Must Throwback

Yes, the sharks are everywhere and making headlines. So, what better time than Shark Week to remind all you ladies to be on the lookout for those illusive predators. Okay, so I’m pulling your leg a little and not talking about the actual ocean variety of shark, but rather the nickname I’ve given to the type of throwback guy who can’t be trusted – the liar, cheater, or con man whose activities are definitely on the fishy side. But I’m deadly serious about the thousands of Shark sightings across the country reported by women who have fallen victim to their manipulative games. You don’t even have to put your toe in the water to run the risk of an encounter with one of these classic Mr. Wrongs so adept at pulling you in, hook, line and sinker.

The Shark: One of Ten Types of Men You Must Throwback

The Shark is #6 on my list of the Ten Types of Men You Must Throwback and the focus of this week’s blog post. He’s a liar who can’t be trusted. Whether he’s the guy pretending to be single who just happens to have a wife hidden away somewhere, or the guy trying to ensnare you in a romantic con-game for money, the Shark gets his name from his well-honed skills of deception and the way he preys on vulnerable women. If you’re willing to put up with his cheating ways, accept his lies as truths, or buy into his con, then you are the perfect Shark bait! (Download The Throwback Cheatsheet infographic here to see all ten types of men to avoid and why.)

The Shark comes in all sizes and manner of attack. He might be the smooth-talking, “out-of-town” salesman you meet in a bar or the on-line hunk whose dating-site bio reads like a dream come true. In fact, the increased use of on-line dating sites has contributed to a significant rise in Shark attacks. It’s there in the murky waters of the Internet that these highly skilled, con-artist Sharks like to engage in a little “Catfishing” – pretending to be someone they’re not, often in search of a woman they can defraud of money. This Shark can be in and out of your life as fast as it takes him to lure you in, make his kill, and run with the spoils.

But as cunning and sneaky as this Throwback may be, he’s not that hard to recognize if you’re willing to open your eyes to the warning signs. Here are a few, but you can learn more about the Shark, along with the other nine Throwbacks, and their early warning signs in my book Is He a Keeper?: Savvy Gal Secrets to Spotting Mr. Wrong and Hooking Mr. Right.

He’s Probably a Shark if:

  • The two of you have never met, yet he’s asking you for money or willing to accept your offer to send him money. He always has such a compelling story of misfortune and he’s a master at getting you to make an offer to help!
  • You’ve caught him in a blatant lie about something he has told you. It could be related to what he does for a living, where he’s from, who he’s been with, or even whether he’s been married before.
  • He’s uncomfortable talking about himself, his past, or his family.
  • You aren’t able to call him. He has to call you.
  • He paints a picture of himself that is almost too good to be true – money, good job, thriving business, important friends, fancy cars – then suddenly he’s dumping his “financial troubles” on you and needs to borrow some money from you.

Do any of those sound familiar? Then you’ve probably encountered a Shark!

Why You Should Avoid the Shark

If things about him just don’t seem right or don’t add up and you think you’ve strayed into Shark infested waters, the best thing you can do is get out quickly. Don’t waste your time with a Shark. Liars and cheaters don’t change. Follow your intuition. You don’t need to wait for proof or have your arm bitten off to take heed of the warning signs!

Until next time, remember to live smart and be savvy in love!

When is Love Not Really Love After All?

rain-couple

When is love not really love? When it’s disguised as an adrenaline “high” One of the factors that can trip up the delicate balance of nature and the mating process and confuse the brain into thinking it’s in love is a rush of adrenaline. High levels of adrenaline occur naturally in the body during a crisis or highly emotional experience. But in the process, they can confuse your senses and make you think you’re attracted to a person when in fact it’s just your body giving you the fuel – the fight or flight charge – you need to deal with the situation at hand. Consider the case of two people meeting during a bank heist where the guy provides comfort and protection as they endure being hostages and wait to be rescued. The woman thinks she’s attracted to her protector when, in truth, it’s just the adrenaline coursing through her veins. Or, take the situation in which you suddenly fall for a male friend who’s there to help after a nasty breakup with your boyfriend. When things get back to normal, you realize the attraction was never there! You’ve confused an adrenaline rush with the euphoria of being in love.

The same thing is happening when you are under the influence of alcohol or drugs. Likewise, women who are strongly attracted to a guy they have to chase after or who seem to crave a relationship full of drama may actually be responding to the adrenaline rush they receive.

All these women are confusing the emotional high they experience with being in love.

The best test for assessing whether you’re experiencing true love or something else is to go back to the qualities you’re looking for in a Keeper relationship. If he doesn’t measure up to what you truly desire in a mate then there may be some other forces at work. So when is love not really love after all?

Relationship Quiz: How to know if it’s love or just hormones

Ask yourself some key questions, like:
  •  Did you meet under unusual circumstances?
  •  Did some crisis or event occur that made you suddenly see this person in a different light?
  •  Were you under the influence of drugs or alcohol when you met or hooked up?
  •  Is there a lot of drama or anxiety associated with your relationship?

If you answer ‘yes’ to any of these then you may very well be confusing an adrenaline high with being in love, which isn’t love after all!

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